


Of lavenders and cosmos.

by laura_sommeils



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Fluff, M/M, Pining, Post-Time Skip, Pre-Relationship, SO MUCH FLUFF
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-23
Updated: 2020-08-23
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:54:09
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,662
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26046856
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/laura_sommeils/pseuds/laura_sommeils
Summary: He doesn’t know exactly if in this case it’d be about winning but truth. He can’t say it yet, but when he touches the cosmos’ paper thin petals before going to bed, he thinks “soon”. He falls asleep and dreams of morning practices, pickled plums, an amber stare and steady hands.
Relationships: Kita Shinsuke/Miya Atsumu
Comments: 10
Kudos: 47





	Of lavenders and cosmos.

One summer in which he feels that nothing is working out as it should and his brain is a cloud of things he wants to achieve but that he is not quite there yet to do so, Atsumu decides to visit Kita’s farm for a week. He thinks it shouldn’t be weird, he’s called Kita to ask if he could and had been told “Yes, of course”, no questions, only a tiny pause before he added “be careful while driving, Atsumu”. And if hearing Kita’s voice has calmed a part of himself that’s been restless for weeks, well, that’s not something he wants to dwell on.

So, it shouldn’t be weird. It isn’t as if they haven’t seen each other in years and Atsumu is just being presumptuous. There’s also the fact that his ex-captain himself sometimes crashes at Osamu’s place in the occasions he decides to come to visit. Which is usually when Atsumu plays against Aran or Suna and, to be honest, he’s still a little bit butthurt about watching Kita clap when Aran’s team won against his. Even though he knows that whining about it will only get him a deadpan stare from Kita and endless teasing from Osamu, he wants to, so bad. Instead, he had to complain to Shoyo and Bokuto about it and only received a sunny smile and a “Hang in there, Tsum-Tsum!” for all his troubles.

He comes armed with sunscreen and presents for Kita’s grandmother. What he doesn’t expect, though, it’s the image of a tanned man, his soft smile and the little wave he gives him when Atsumu gets out of the car, to make him trip over air and almost fall to the floor. The only reason his face doesn’t salute the earth is his ex-captain’s hold on his arm, acting as his support while he steadies himself. 

The only thing Atsumu can notice at first is how the veins in Kita’s forearm seem like endless rivers. The second thing, and the one that would make Osamu very happy if he ever found out is: Atsumu is really stupid. Because if he ever thought that it’d be ok, that he’d be fine with those amber eyes fixed on him the way they are now, then he’s been a big fat liar.

Because it shouldn’t be weird, at all.

Except, it kind of is.

Kita grows a surprising amount of flowers, the only ones Atsumu knows the name of are lavender, cosmos, marigold. When he asks him about it, the other man says it’s to attract bees. Some of them attract other insects so they won’t go to the actual harvest, it’s a biological way of not having to use chemical pesticides.

And it shouldn’t be a revelation to Atsumu, how this fits Kita. How the image of endless fields, a gentle breeze and the nurturing earth seem like a part of him already. He decides to take his eyes off him and trails his fingers over foxtail, the grass’ pointed tips gently pricking his skin.

And neither should it be surprising, the dawning realization that a part of Miya Atsumu wants to belong here, too.

He wakes up one morning to find a vase full with pink cosmos and lavender springs sitting on the floor outside his bedroom, the petals are soft and the lavender’s fragrance makes him subconsciously relax his shoulders. He knows Kita woke up three hours before him and is already working in the fields, so he asks his grandmother about it and she simply says “Kita saw you trying to sniff them when you thought he wasn’t looking, he said you got scared by the bees, and that with this, you wouldn’t have to worry about them. “

Neither of them mention them when Kita comes back for lunch, but it’s when they’re sitting alone, talking about the next volleyball season and how Kita should just give up and wear Atsumu’s jersey number, because he’s the one who’s going to always win, that Atsumu deliberately brushes his thig against Kita’s and leaves it there. Shinsuke doesn’t move his leg, just sighs and serves Atsumu more water.

Atsumu counts it as a personal win.

It isn’t until the night before he has to leave for the city again that he decides to say “I want to go far and battle it out against every team. I’m still a sore loser, yeah, but I think there are worse things to be.”

And he doesn’t know if what he’s looking forward with saying that is acceptance, exactly, but he’s always respected the person sitting beside him and, even though he still doesn’t know how, sometimes he believes that Kita understands him better than himself. That or he could be a secret mind reader, which is even scarier. He still blames Suna for making him consider that a possibility.

Kita stares at him, it’s the same look he used to give him in highschool and that makes Atsumu feel like he’s being analyzed to the point Kita probably can see every shitty thing he’s ever done, and it isn’t until he starts to fidget with his fingers that his ex-captain finally says “Being you, I know you’ll find a way to win, when it’s clouding your mind too much, maybe erase the memories of failure and create new ones. The way in which we view the world is different, but I’ve always admired that you could do that.” He takes a sip of his tea before adding “There are always battles ahead. I still haven’t found a way to win against the birds, though, they come and peck at my tomatoes and then leave them half eaten.”

And it’s ridiculous and bizarre and not a situation he ever thought he’d be in. And Atsumu doesn’t plan it, it’s always been something that he thought that if he ignored it long enough it’ll eventually disappear, but he finds himself blurting out “I liked you in highschool.”

(He doesn’t say now, he doesn’t think he’s strong enough to say “now”)

Kita gazes at him and says “I know, I liked you, too” and then keeps drinking his tea as if he hadn’t changed Atsumu’s entire world.

He wants to ask “What?!!! When? Did you ever stop? Because I couldn’t stop, it’s always been there.” Instead he says “Uh?!!!” and Kita laughs and pats his hair and leaves him there in the patio to go to bed.

It’s the next morning and his travel pack is already on the back of his car, sitting closely to a bag of rice that could feed him for months. He’s holding the car’s keys and, if he isn’t careful, he’s pretty sure he’s just going to activate the alarm and make an ass of himself. He stands next to Kita and just gazes at him for what it seems like an eternity before he can muster the courage to say “Can I come back one of these days?”

Kita’s eyes crinkle and his smile is so soft and Atsumu just want to kiss him so badly his mind is already trying to find the way in which to do so without Kita’s grandmother hitting him with her broom so he’ll stop molesting her grandson.

Kita grabs the setter’s right hand and rubs his thumb against Atsumu’s knuckles, his finger tracing the skin and branding it almost as if it was something they’ve done every day, every week, every month, for years. It’s a gesture that Atsumu wants, every day, every week, every month, for years, for eternity.

“I’d like it very much if you did.” Words he thinks for a moment that they’re just a dream, but that have weight in the reality of Kita’s hand still touching his.

And Atsumu, like the giant idiot that he is, can merely respond with an “It’s a deal, then.”

It’s when he’s going back to the city, traffic lights and so much noise that he almost wants to go back to the farm already, that a part of his brain thinks “I couldn’t say it now, but soon”. There’s the phantom memory of Shinsuke’s thumb caressing his knuckles and the way he said “Being you, I know you’ll find a way to win.”

There’s that and pink flowers, prickling foxtail, the sun warming up his back when he helped to carry some of the harvest.

Atsumu, not surprisingly, wants all of it and more. So much more.

He trains, sleeps and teases Omi-kun way more than he probably should, and sticks out his tongue at Tobio-kun when Shoyo is doing an unprompted video call in the changing room. Everything clicks again and they’re going to crush them all, and he couldn’t be happier.

He goes to a green house and it isn’t until he’s putting the pink cosmos and lavender on his balcony, careful hands so he won’t damage the plants, that his mind falls on the way Kita said “I know, I liked you, too”. He doesn’t want to confuse past with present but he thinks there was a hint of a lie in the past sentence. In the way Kita was quick to wish him goodnight, a truth behind the falsehood revealed in thoughtful gestures and a deep believe rotten in what Atsumu is. 

He doesn’t know exactly if in this case it’d be about winning but truth. He can’t say it yet, but when he touches the cosmos’ paper thin petals before going to bed, he thinks “soon”. He falls asleep and dreams of morning practices, pickled plums, an amber stare and steady hands.

In the countryside, there’s someone waking up to the memory of morning practices, an unrepentant smirk, hands finding any excuse available to touch his forearms, a defiant glare and an unbendable will.

Kita gets up to face the dawn, his fingers touching the petals of the pink flower on his nightstand before he leaves the bedroom.

(He can’t say it yet, but

 _soon_.)

**Author's Note:**

> I love Kita/Atsumu so much so I thought about Atsumu not being ready to make his move and Kita knowing what he feels and suspecting Atsumu's feelings and the tiny details of care and comfort he gives him, and how Atsumu clings to the flowers as if they were a piece of Kita he can take care of and nurture while he readies himself to be vulnerable and try for a relationship with him.


End file.
